Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
Thats gotta be it. Also just found out that the fireworks will fit in the airsoft pistols...we are all gonna die
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
She's in labor and I'm doing shots. Whose the real winner here?
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
Can't. Way too high. Forgot how to operate doors. Stuck outside.Come get me.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Randomize
