I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
I gave the naked guy in the hotel a pop tart. He stopped crying.
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
New drunken fun fact of last night, after I pushed Sarah and before I started making out with guy #1, I shouted that I'd go to third base on a first date, then threw myself at him
I'm going to be fiscally responsible and buy a handle.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
Just got home. Taking a quick shower. I smell like sex and chorizo. Dont ask.
Aside from the possibility of pregnancy, I'm going to call last night a raging success.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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