The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
She just locked herself in the bedroom with an unopened bottle of wine and a steak knife. Unfortunately for her fingers, I stopped giving a fuck two hours ago.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
My mom just added me on Facebook... She has one like and it's Will Smith
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
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