i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
she just gave her compliments to the chief, at dennys
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
Randomize
