I'm seeing double. Its like being in a room full of people
of course. lets lasso hookers.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
For some reason I knew you were going to smell like strippers and burritos when I hugged you.
every facebook tagged picture of yours, you are either drinking, swimming or drunk in water
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
Flacco has been sacked like 7 times. His name also auto corrects to Flaccid. That's so sad
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
I felt the need to set off fireworks in the living room while they were having sex upstairs. Yes, they quieted down.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
