Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
he said 'i want to be the peanut butter to your jelly, just without the crust' and then tried to take me shirt off
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
By the end of the cruise, there was literally nothing in our room he hadn't peed on.
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
I feel like my chances would have been better if I hadn't told her "I need to fuck you before you leave."
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
He awkwardly handed me plan b on Pickens Street... it was like a sketchy drug deal.
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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