Whenever he makes me dinner its always mini things.. cheeseburgers, corndogs.. is he preparing me for something?
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
My mom just bought me $200 worth of booze on the condition that I promise I won't have to go to rehab eventually
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
I want to let you in on my two latest life goals. Have a photograph of me squirting whipped cream into a midget's mouth, and have sex on a roof.
Living room floor. I asked him to give me a back rub. He did. And smoothly transitioned that to foreplay, then basically threw me on the floor. My vagina hurts. He deserves another Christmas present.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
You caught me at a bad time. I'm stoned enough that I'm ready to sleep but also not stoned enough that I wanna smoke again but also stoned enough to not wanna drive anywhere
I think I’ve reached sophomore-year-level of bad ideas
and you know that’s the highest possible level because it’s when I met you
How is it possible for someone who gets so many dick picks sent to her, to be experiencing such a complete and utter lack of dick IRL.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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