Call me when you're up
Great dream, you were in it
One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
Do you think "I had sex with my co-worker last night I don't think I can come in today" is a good excuse?
i woke up to her playing with my penis. just wiggling it around and around. awkward night? i would say so.
You'd think with all the porn he watches he'd be a little better at this...
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
slept with a 6'5 mountain man from Montana and then he played 'Girls Just Wanna Have Fun' on repeat..
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
Randomize
