Will you still be my friend if I read and enjoyed Twilight?
No
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
His dick might not be the answer to my problems, but I'm definitely ok with testing it as a possible solution.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
She fucked me for a ride to the airport. If this is what the rest of college is like, I'm never graduating.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
I got eaten out in the igloo at snow-kings castle last night.My thighs were literally melting ruts in the ice bench.Definitely colder than the minus 40 blowjob at Desiree's wedding
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
