I don't believe in a God but I'm almost positive I just shit out the devil.
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
just woke up to two already rolled blunts and a full explanation of what happened last night. I love my gf
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
I ran a string through all of my old vicodin bottles and strung them on the tree. Tis the season.
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Do Not. I repeat. DO NOT DRINK WHISKEY TO COPE. You will end up in jail. LEARN FROM THE PRO
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Now, one of you come feed me, the other read me my physics book...I'm too hungover for this shit...
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
Randomize