Starbucks introducing alcohol. i hear angels singing.
I just found out I have a small penis.
Couldn't you tell by how you've NEVER had a girlfriend?
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
I think the 8 yr old is hitting on me and they just prayed for the salvation of third world countries
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
No I need this job. I actually contemplated buying a vibrator with my dad's credit card the other night.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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