Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I saw his package. It spoke to me.
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
i said i was sorry for his girlfriend's cancer diagnosis and he said "easy come, easy go" and tried to fuck me
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
i'm gonna need a rally to restore sobriety after this weekend...
Trying to guess which perfume the stripper was wearing based on my bf's clothes
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I should start an etsy shop with all the jewelry and clothes women leave at my house
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
We need a shit load of segways right now
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
Is it ok that I asked him half way through sex why he hadn't accepted my friend request yet?
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
