is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Nice 2 c u showing ur bro some affection
I just saw a hobo ride by on a unicycle. Good day.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
Go on vacation with her and forget to pack pants. I did that once and it worked like a charm.
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
He sent me a picture of his dick earlier so now we can all laugh at him tomorrow
Dude. I realize why I got sick. 8 shots three beers in an hour. Plus I ate an expired lunchable earlier.
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
I AM SO HORNY, I AM GOING TO DIE. I NEED SOMEONE TO WISH MY VAGINA A MERRY CHRISTMAS.
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
Randomize