I think i peed on brittanys purse
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
I can never have sex in Utah again. The altitude had me breathing like a fat kid going up stairs.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
Randomize
