these pics are all outta focus - was this what the camera saw? or what your eyes saw?
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I ishhh haha are u coming nack easyer?
the fact that I know you're asking me if I'm coming home for easter makes me believe I speak fluent vodka.
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Taco Bell is better for you than cocaine, I promise.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Randomize
