Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
We had to go. She called the bartender a thundercunt.
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
Randomize
