Help i just walked in on mom blowing dad
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
saw my dad's penis on the x-ray last night. at least his hip wasn't broken
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
But I REALLY want to hide my crazy for as long as possible with him so he'll date me.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
Plus he probably didn't want to be at home, alone... Jacking off on the big screen without you there to lend a helping hand. I mean, let's be honest. It's not fun if it's not a little weird.
Randomize
