she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
you tried to do a keg stand and ended up flipping over it and onto the table
I just got asked if I have a rule for sleeping with people. Like they have to buy me dinner first etc...
On that note, do I have a rule?
Are we responsible for the snowmen doing it doggy-style in my front yard?
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
I think I ingested my vampire fangs last night.
You know what else? He didn't even get to see my butt. And my butt is really cute. Car sex is awful.
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
You -do- realize there are other things to talk about than just how different parts of you smell like pussy, right?
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
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