Def gonna have stinky sex sometime soon. GOT TO! she has eligible friends for you, as well.
yeah she was being a bitch. do you remember me stealing ryan cabrerra's beer?!?!
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I just want to point out that nothing makes my hickie/hangover more obvious than sleeping in a scarf and sunglasses. nothing.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
Are u alive? If u are, you deserve an award.
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
Randomize
