i just noticed 4 flies in my red wine. i drank them.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
The hookup that almost was... Both partys too drunk to migrate to the other.... the universe has won this one.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
I think I must have activated my bat signal.... All three of my FWBs contacted me today!
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
Randomize
