Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
If you get a breast reduction, you have to let me see them before hand at least once. It's a rule.
i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
I left when they started reinacting what appeared to be a jerry springer episode
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Because its Monday... And I'm determined to just be drunk for the rest of the semester
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
A million fucking miles away, and the sun still manages to fuck my hungover mornings up.
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Randomize
