The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
You keep asking me questions like I have this magical thing called a memory
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
What did you even date her?
because emotionally unstable girls are great in bed.
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
I think all I remember saying is, "I love Chris Berman's voice" and then I passed out
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
I got so tired of my roommates fucking in the tub I took a shit in it. Surprise!
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