I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Just woke up. My philosophy paper is a play, and my paper for musical theater is about physics. That's some dank shit you sold me
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
I just undressed him with my eyes. And gave him a 10 inch penis. I hope its true.
while you've been gone this has kinda turned into some sort of fivesome-type thing. just thought i should warn you for when you get back
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
Yeah, I'm just gonna try to repress that and remember him for his big dick and perfect jawline.
I'm in Home Depot and I can feel the straight bob the builders staring at me. I bet it's like I have a rainbow arrow pointing at me.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Randomize
