Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
he slipped a picture of a kangaroo under my door that said "im sorry" on the back and passed out on my lawn.. who the fuck is this kid?
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I peed on his girlfriend's loofah during our post-sex shower.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
Thanks for being my pregnancy scare Sherpa...
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Randomize
