I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
You rubbed your penis on my leg and said "people have paid for this kind of action"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
At one point during xmas dinner my whole family was double fisting. It was like thats how I learned to drink moment
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
I want this pizza in and around my mouth forever..
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
You drunkenly told one of the campus security guards that you liked his headset. In return he introduced himself, lit your cig, and told us that if anyone was giving us shit to call and ask for him... Best campus security ever.
She’s 47 and wants me to fuck her on her mom’s hospital bed
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