Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
i just walked outside for a cigarette and three men walked by in glitter heels and gold shiny thongs. god i love chicago
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
Took 45 minutes to masturbate. Fuck you Zoloft. I'm never gonna be diagnosed with depression again
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
I saw Nicolas Cage's face in the moon. Those were good shrooms.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
I'm high. The text bubbles floating do no justice to the underwater experiences
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
"suitors" is just a nice way of her saying "the guys i'm fucking"
Randomize
