there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Some guy just watched me feed 30 dimes and 3 quarters for bread and cheese at the self checkout at walmart. I no longer comprehend shame...
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
I think I just broke my ankle. I've only had one beer. I'm getting drunk before I go to the ER so it's less embarassing.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
That is an awkward looking cockshot, not gonna lie
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I had no idea he had such passive aggressive animalistic tendencies. This is the human equivalent of peeing on someone.
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
Randomize