wow, farting in latex pants is really awkward.
she took her bra off and it was like the puppet strings had been dropped. her tits totally deflated.
I can't tell if I miss summer or 5 times a day sex more.
Soup is not an acceptable meal before doing that many Jager bombs
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Oh BTW the next time I see you I don't care where we are your dick will be going into some part of my body.
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
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