You know the guy who poops at a party and then leaves and you go in, do your business, and come out and there are girls outside that think you pooped and no one talks to you? I'm the guy who poops before you go in, because I'm in a relationship and I hate you.
I've been congratulating people on facebook about their forthcoming pregnancies. I can't wait to see how this plays out
Homecoming wouldn't be the same without all the drunk old people puking on the street.
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
Come over. Drunk tacos.
That isn't even a sentence.
I kept the important parts.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were ushered out of Medieval Times by a squire for making out in the torture chamber. Children were present.
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
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