double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
yeah i didn't know anyone, but i just walked in with a lit sparkler and wearing a budweiser shirt and someone handed me a beer.
Dude, its flawless. what could go wrong?
Jail. That could go wrong.
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
We poured some Korbel out for our homie Dick Clark.
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
The night was crazy enough that we did a workout. Instructed by the bouncer at 2am
New guy moved in the apartment next door. He's a combat vet, 6'4", Adonis body and going to med school. My vagina is chewing thru the wall as we speak.
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
Randomize
