No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I think someone spiked my drink last night. .. Like all 20 of them.
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
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