Firetruck pulls up, fireman jumps out n knocks on my door, asks "do you know where Johnny lives?"
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
yeah...i noticed he pets people when he's drunk. It's odd.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
My way of showing team usa support, bronze: handy silver: bj gold: home run. God, I'm patriotic
Perfect. And my grandma just called me and talked to me for eighteen minutes telling me that she was worried because of my Halloween costume that I'm not a Christian and that I'm not eating. Wtf.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
I think he is using me to sort through his relationship issues, past and present. I did not sign up for this. All I want is booty. Am I the dude in this relationship?
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