it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
thankjk goddddn taco bell uis open htis lateee!
you do know it's eleven in the afternoon, right?
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
He got a slutty, ugly mother of a 7 year old, and I got a dog that only sleeps and shits on clean clothes. No one won in this break up.
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
You're like Jane Goodall in a forest of gay men. Someday your autobiography will be called "Bottoms in the Mist".
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Guess who just enrolled into online classes at Hogwarts? This gal.
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
You set fire to his cat.
In my defense, I did not think it would be in the trash bag.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Randomize
