Was i wearing a white blazer when you superpoke danced me??
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
He just seriously used the word "skeet." Can we please find another way to get weed?
No. Take one for the team.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
splinters make it hard to masturbate
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I usually just read books and meditate to an aquatic soundtrack of sea walrus's mating. But ill choose coors light instead
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Please put me on a plane and hypontize me into forgetting the little bit of last night that I do remember.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
I’m mid 4sum and you’re sending me photos of your cat. We had very different evenings.
Randomize
