sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
look what he's done to me, i actually want to be a stripper now.
I Know I'm the drunk girl in the trunk right now, BUT PLEASE LISTEN TO ME!
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
Im blowing my nose and the only thing coming out is beer
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I know he'd never cheat on me. It'd be like choosing Mexican tap water over Patron.
Although I would ideally cut back on smoking weed, imagine what getting high and looking for our spirit animals would be like
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
I have hit the ultimate fuck buddy status. We pulled over in a construction zone to have a quickie.
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Randomize
