I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
Of course that's what I'm wearing. I need to find a beard to mount and ride STAT.
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
If I had your ass I would rule the world
our moms work together...I can just see the conversation now, hey your daughter ruined my sons marriage, that's probably how it will start.
Randomize
