And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
Remember the girl passed out in front of my fireplace?
Just did a walk of shame dressed as a cowgirl and walked past his ex's entire sorority. Yippee kye aye, motherfucker.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
What do you mean you don't want me to steal the manikin do you have any idea how expensive inflatable dolls are I can't get that for your birthday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
First you stole a hockey stick out of the nieghbors yard and claimed you were moses leading his children home. Then you led us around the same block twice before I called the cab
Randomize