ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Today was brought to you by the letter B for beer and bourbon and the number fuck you I'm meant to be studying not hungover
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
He told me that he's proud of our abnormalcy as a couple. I think it's the most romantic thing he's ever said.
Afterwards the first thing I said was, "You know, you're probably the first guy who has ever gotten laid wearing Star Wars pajama bottoms."
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
