Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
hooking up with my manager sounds like an even better idea while i'm sober.
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
Leaving someone plastered on a corner at 3am telling them to just scream for cock is NOT being a good wingman.
his name is devion and he has a voice like velvet and handcuffs
If you can count on one hand the number of times you have actually, truly nearly died this month, then you are not really living yet.
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
We go out and drink, fuck, and I stay the night. He agrees to it because he knows I'll hook him up to IV fluids in the morning. Everyone wins
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
i dont believe you. i want proof. if you end up at a hospital send me a pic.
Randomize
