Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
The water bill last month was outrageous. We have got to stop fucking for hours in the shower
Just signed my boyfriend up on a dating website so I could officially have a reason to leave him for my hot neighbor.
they fed me a peach. i was laying on the floor telling them how beautiful they were
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
Just because the energy drink is shaped like a grenade doesnt make it cool to throw it and yell "BOOM" and break my flatscreen, asshole
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I just have to decide what I love more, food or dick.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
Randomize
