Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
You peed in my camelbak and said it was a reverse catheter. Not cool.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
I just wanna get drunk and watch Tarzan with you is that to much to ask?!?
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I am still worried she'll have a seizure durring. What would I do? Try to ride it out and finish, or pull out and assist?
Randomize