U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Are you pissed because you didn't get action, or the fact i got boned twice in public places tonight?
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Randomize
