Fine. I'll sleep in my office
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
i wasn't gonna shower then i remembered i slept in my own piss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sex with you deserves a trophy and a day of remembrance in honor of it.
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
True life: I got so drunk that i took a shower with my clothes on at 4 am...
Randomize