Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
was it mean of me to chase him screaming "DO YOU EVER WANT TO BE ABLE TO HAVE CHILDREN?!"?
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just dropped my bong into 7 pieces, and carried the glass shards around my house. dad saw the blood dripping down my arms, and asked if i slit my wrists. way too high to laugh at this.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Told some guy to hold your weave while you "tried" to kick his girlfriends ass...
You raged at the rock climbing place for not selling beer and then just said "fuck it" and pulled out a flask.
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
Honestly cannot tell if I’m magical or really, really high.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Plus my parents would be pissed if I spent Thanksgiving in jail... again.
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