so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
If I threw up, how do I still have the same piece of gum in my mouth from the beginning of the night?
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
My new plan is to whip out my titties when they arrive. Maybe they won’t notice that I broke the couch fucking my boss...
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
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