sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
I woke up to find her cooking breakfast wearing nothing but my Nuggets jersey. I don't think this could end better.
for real. he might as well bring dogs if they're lower than a 7.
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
How drunk you think somebody has to be, that they think that putting out a profile pic like that can be even a slightly good idea?
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
