Omg just saw this kid I went to elementary school with at the bar and he used to be cool and I was so awkward but now I have boobs so I WIN.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
If you try to operate on me with a Bic pen and vodka, I'm never talking to you again
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
now that I know that you did coke with your mom I can't look at her the same
im pretty sure the interns at this hospital have gotten hotter
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
what the fuck happend anyway? How did it go from smoothies after work to blacking out?
What the fuck dude?
Sorry bro...
YOU HUMPED ME FOR AN HOUR WHILE YELLING "I GOTTA ASSERT DOMINANCE"
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
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