Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I wish they made sweatshirts for legs
you mean pants?
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I had five suicidal voicemails from him when I woke up this morning. They all started and ended with "DON'T FUCK MY ROOMMATES".
It was only one, it doesn't count.
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
there is vomit in the pocket of my dress coat. i remember thinking "this is a weird place to puke" at some point in the evening, but i dont understand how i did this.
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Hey you're my best friend, I'm sorry I picked my vagina over my heart last night.
When I planned out my evening, "co-author lesbian vampire erotica" was not anywhere on my list of expected activities.
Me neither, but hey, this is where we've ended up. Let's embrace the moment.
Randomize
