so, totally just picked up a pack of red bull, and some magnum condoms and the old woman at the register's tone went from "hi blah how are you" to "oh....how YOU DOIN'?" she knew what was up
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
Like reprimanding the wall for "sneaking up on me" drunk
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
He walked into the pizza shop... Pulled the fire alarm.. And proceeded to dance to it...
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
so i find a box of condoms inside my car with turn by turn directions to her bedroom... kinda freaked out cause she got my address and somehow inside my car
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