Good news! Whoever used this stall at Target earlier...not pregnant!
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
I feel as though I could trust her, I mean she did tell me she was married before we had sex.
Pre-game strategy: play thunder by yourself in the shower. Surprisingly, success.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
I just wanna go somewhere and not be judged for wearing spandex shorts that make my ass look like a slice of fucking heaven. Is that so much to ask??
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Randomize